I Am Where I Am
Jeff and I have an apartment below our eldest daughter, son in law and two grandchildren. We also have my mom in law, staying with us for her annual two-month visit. It can get a bit crazy, especially when one of the children starts to scream, like earlier this morning when I heard Syona the 2-year old screaming her head off in their home above. So I went upstairs to see if I could help.
My daughter was in the midst of clearing breakfast dishes, getting her son Armando (aged four) ready for school and dealing with Syona who was by this time kicking and screaming on the kitchen floor. “She doesn’t want to put her shoes on.” Yelled my daughter above the noise.
I bent down to pick her up. It’s amazing how such a small child can make such a big noise and at the same time make herself so impossible to hold–she should try out for Circ du Solei. So above the screaming I yelled back, “you take him to school and I’ll take care of Syona.” Her sigh of relief was like opening a new can of coffee and hearing all the air expel. “Thanks mom!”
So they left and now it was me and Syona. I managed to pick her up and take her to the window. “Look at the beautiful leaves on the tree.” Bawl, bawl, yell, yell. “Look at all the people going to work.” Sob, sob, scream, scream. “See the yellow car, isn’t it a lovely color.” Sob, sob. “Look at that gorgeous little bird flying onto the branch.” Silence. “I wonder if he’s a happy little bird?” I wipe her nose. ”I think he’s a happy bird just like you.” Her little body shudders with an unsung sob. We stand in silence for a moment and then I hear her little voice pipe up.
“Man go work.” She points at a man with a briefcase who is walking to the EL. ”Train! I hear train.” Slowly, she starts pointing out everything she sees on the street below. It becomes a game and we are both seeing things we hadn’t noticed before, like squirrels, dogs out walking, and people on bicycles. And as we stand looking out I realize there is nothing going on. I am Where I Am, and so is she.
I vow for the rest of the day to distract myself from negative thoughts by realising that I Am Where I Am. All I have to do is get out of my head and know that I am alive and this is a great day. People are living their lives and going about their daily business just like me. it doesn’t get much better than this. I make my mom in law a cup of tea and she smiles.
Have a fantastic day. Val
Add comment September 20th, 2006